Matthew 9: 14,15 -Then the disciples of John came to Him saying, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast often, but Your disciples do not fast?” And Jesus said to them, “Can the friends of the bridegroom mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them? But the day will come when the bridegroom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast.”
Now that Jesus has ascended to the right hand of the Father I must mourn, I must fast for Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted (Mt. 5:4). I mourn the loss of Jesus physically dwelling with me on earth. My Beloved is not tangibly present in the day to day. This should break my heart. I should be sick with love for Him, to see Him, to be with Him where He is.
Why am I not?
I do not want the pleasures of life if my Beloved is not in them. I do not want to satisfy longing in my spirit with things other than Jesus. I want a mourning heart. I want to feel the sting of loss. I want to see the depths of depravity when Jesus is not present.
I refuse to let culture or relevant Christianity tell me how and what to think obtains happiness or a good quality of life. I desire for Jesus to define my reality over and over and over again. I want to offer my life as weak, small and insignificant just so that Christ may be lifted up in me.
Holy Spirit I ask for a heart that mourns, weeps and laments over the absence of the bridegroom. I am the bride I have to, want to, must be distraught, inconsolable except for the presence of my Beloved. He is who I want. He is the source of all definitions of joy, gladness and success in this life.
I just want You, Jesus. You’re all I want. I will mourn for the loss of You, but I know that You will come and lift my weary eyes to gaze upon Your burning, jealous love; a most vehement flame.
To live in Your reality. The Father’s heart for humanity is sorrowful. He sees His children running around killing each other, cutting one another down, lying, stealing and hoarding. His heart is love. His joy is peace. He is complete in unity. I mourn as You do, Father. How quickly man turns to strife, bitterness and tolerance, even in Your bride. Where is love? Where are those not looking to be repaid for kindness? Not looking for tax breaks or any other reward? And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you (Luke 14:14).
Hear the cry of a lovesick heart yearning for and looking to the kingdom ruled by the King of kings, my Beloved and Redeemer. Give me a heart that mourns to find Jesus in this present reality.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Who is God
Some knowledge of what kind of God it is that operates the universe is indispensable to a sound philosophy of life and a sane outlook on the world scene. – A.W. Tozer Knowledge of the Holy
I have not viewed God rightly. My perceptions of relationships colliding with His truths wrecked the process of His grace through my lack of revelation of His true nature. God is not defined by His character traits, or at least the only ones we know of. He is not a balance of parts, but actually the absence of parts: uncreated.
Attempting to ponder the infinitude of God I always deemed useless which, in return, deemed my understanding of Him wrongly. It was always, “Why me? Can’t you just fix this God? You need me to carry out Your work so make me blameless.” No, no, no. How vain of me to think that God must make all efforts to change the nature of my flesh. He wants partnership not a dictatorship. I am made in the image of God, I do not possess all qualities that comprise Him; therefore, I lack strength to carry out His purposes and must redirect my free will unto His desires.
Before the law man did not know what was wrong and what was right. Nothing other than nature existed and because man unconsciously knew of the sin in his heart the law exposed sin. To die to oneself is to admit the faults of man and choose God. Man possesses nothing and must depend upon God through the exercising of moral choice.
In grace through Christ’s fleshly death and divine resurrection, man has now become victorious over sin. Belief in Christ has reversed nature’s sting and plants a new principle in our hearts so that our conduct genuinely desires to promote God. This is the denying of yourself, this is taking up of your cross, this is following God.
He is not against me, He is for me. He does not need me, He wants me. God has not backed Himself into a defenseless corner begging humanity to help Him redeem His reputation. God is not asking us to honor Him out of false pity. He is the undefended Defender. Unbelief is actually putting trust in dying men rather than the Eternal One. God is self-sufficient.
Let hope be the faith in the unseen natural realm and obedience resound because of the testimony of our lives. God is not comprised of love and dishes it out whenever we have been good little children. God is love, so we soak in Him every moment that acknowledges grace, truth and abundant life.
I have not viewed God rightly. My perceptions of relationships colliding with His truths wrecked the process of His grace through my lack of revelation of His true nature. God is not defined by His character traits, or at least the only ones we know of. He is not a balance of parts, but actually the absence of parts: uncreated.
Attempting to ponder the infinitude of God I always deemed useless which, in return, deemed my understanding of Him wrongly. It was always, “Why me? Can’t you just fix this God? You need me to carry out Your work so make me blameless.” No, no, no. How vain of me to think that God must make all efforts to change the nature of my flesh. He wants partnership not a dictatorship. I am made in the image of God, I do not possess all qualities that comprise Him; therefore, I lack strength to carry out His purposes and must redirect my free will unto His desires.
Before the law man did not know what was wrong and what was right. Nothing other than nature existed and because man unconsciously knew of the sin in his heart the law exposed sin. To die to oneself is to admit the faults of man and choose God. Man possesses nothing and must depend upon God through the exercising of moral choice.
In grace through Christ’s fleshly death and divine resurrection, man has now become victorious over sin. Belief in Christ has reversed nature’s sting and plants a new principle in our hearts so that our conduct genuinely desires to promote God. This is the denying of yourself, this is taking up of your cross, this is following God.
He is not against me, He is for me. He does not need me, He wants me. God has not backed Himself into a defenseless corner begging humanity to help Him redeem His reputation. God is not asking us to honor Him out of false pity. He is the undefended Defender. Unbelief is actually putting trust in dying men rather than the Eternal One. God is self-sufficient.
Let hope be the faith in the unseen natural realm and obedience resound because of the testimony of our lives. God is not comprised of love and dishes it out whenever we have been good little children. God is love, so we soak in Him every moment that acknowledges grace, truth and abundant life.